The First and Only Time
by ilovemysistersofie
Summary: When Charles goes to visit Sebastian at Brideshead he reveals his love for him. Unfortunately, Sebastian's mother does not approve. Sebastian/Charles pairing, oneshot


Charles peered up at the massive house in front of him. _Brideshead_, he thought to himself and smiled. The idea of seeing Sebastian again gave him a warm feeling in his heart. As he walked up to the huge, grand doors he thought of all the wonderful things that he and Sebastian might do together. He had a big grin on his face when the doors were opened for him by one of the maids. She looked at him strangely before asking him what he was doing there.

"I'm Charles Ryder, I'm here to visit Sebastian," he informed her. She nodded and let him inside. She told him to wait here while she went to let Sebastian know of his arrival and take his bags to his room. While he waited he let his mind drift back to Sebastian. When he had received his telegram telling him to come at once his heart leapt into his throat. It wasn't just that he had to make sure that Sebastian was okay, it was more than that. It hadn't been that long since he last saw him- only a month or so- but he still found that he missed him more than ever. He didn't understand it, how one person could have such a large effect on his life. Charles thought of Sebastian every single day, and often in his dreams as well. He had never thought of anyone as much as he did Sebastian. He wondered at times if he liked Sebastian as more than just his friend.

"Charles?"

Charles turned at the sound of his name to see Sebastian sitting in a wheelchair. He rushed toward him and kneeled so that he was at the right level to look into Sebastian's eyes.

"Sebastian," he said a bit confused, "in your telegram you told me you were dying. You seem to be just fine."

Sebastian laughed, a light, jingling noise that filled Charles' heart with warmth. "I'm sorry Charles, I had to say _something _to get you to come. If I had told you that I only had broken my ankle would you have come?"

"Of course," he said, smiling up at Sebastian. Sebastian smiled back and laid his hand on Charles' cheek. Charles felt the beating of his heart quicken as he leaned in close to Sebastian's face. His lips were just an inch away from his when he heard someone clear their throat behind them. Surprised, Charles turned abruptly to find a young woman with short brown hair standing in the hallway.

"Whatever is the matter Julia?" Sebastian asked, annoyed.

"Dinner will be served soon so I think it would be best for you to show your guest to his room before then." She walked away as soon as she finished saying this.

Charles stood up and asked, "Who was that?"

"My sister, Julia," he said turning his chair, "now come, let me show you your room." He looked up at Charles and smiled before adding, "It's right next to mine."

* * *

After dinner Charles and Sebastian were sitting on the back porch, drinking and asking each other questions.

"Is it true that you're a painter?" Sebastian asked as he poured himself and Charles another glass of wine.

"It depends on how you look at it." He took a sip.

"What do you mean?" Sebastian asked this as if it was the most interesting thing in the world.

"Well I'm a painter in the sense that I paint, but I don't make any money off of it."

Sebastian nodded and took a sip of his wine. "Will you paint me sometime?"

Charles looked at him and put a hand on his knee. "I don't think I could ever do it well enough."

Sebastian rested his hand on Charles'. "I'm sure you can. I believe in you." He paused and sighed deeply before saying, "Do you love me Charles?"

Charles turned his head sharply to look at him. "What do you mean Sebastian? Of course I love you."

"No, I don't mean as a friend, I mean are you in love with me?"

Charles had to think for a moment. He cared deeply about Sebastian and was constantly thinking about him, but did that mean he was in love with him? He wasn't sure. He had never been in love before so he didn't know what it felt like, but one thing was for sure: he didn't feel the way about anyone else like he did about Sebastian. After he thought about it he looked back at Sebastian, and saw that he had a hurt look on his face.

"The fact that you had to think about it for so long tells me the answer is no." He started to stand but Charles grabbed his hand before he could leave him. "Charles, let go of me!" he said forcefully as he tried to pull his hand out of Charles' grip.

"I can't Sebastian," he said tenderly, "I can't let go." Sebastian stopped struggling.

"Why not?" he asked softly.

"Because I love you," Charles replied without a moment's hesitation. Sebastian seemed to holding his breath, waiting for Charles to continue. "I wasn't sure before but I am now. I love you Sebastian, more than anyone or anything in the world." He stood up and looked deeply into Sebastian's eyes. "I love you." He placed his hand on his cheek again and moved in to kiss him but Sebastian pulled away.

"Not here," he whispered.

* * *

Once they were safely inside Sebastian's room, the door closed and locked, Sebastian pressed his lips to Charles'. Charles put his hands on Sebastian's shoulders and pulled his body as close to his as possible. Their lips moved in a perfect rhythm together, as Sebastian moved his hands inside Charles' jacket, trying to pull it off. Charles stopped kissing him long enough to help Sebastian take off both of their jackets. Charles pulled Sebastian's face back to his as Sebastian worked on unbuttoning each of their shirts.

Once all their clothes were off Charles pushed Sebastian onto the bed. He laid on top of him and kissed him passionately as Sebastian's hands explored his body. Charles moved on from Sebastian's lips and began to kiss him everywhere else. He kissed his ear first, then moved down to his neck and collarbone, he kissed his chest and moved his lips lower and lower, Sebastian's moaning and gasping increasing as he did so. Finally he got down between his thighs and kissed him there. Sebastian's moans turned into quiet screams as he gasped Charles' name over and over.

* * *

When they had finished they laid close to each other, breathing hard. Sebastian laid his head on Charles' chest, listening for the rapid beating of his heart.

"I love you Charles," he said quietly. Charles thought he heard a hint of sadness in his voice.

"I love you too Sebastian," he said back to him. "Why do you sound so unhappy?"

"Because this is the only time we'll ever get to do this." He brushed his hand over the surface of Charles' chest.

"Why is that?"

"Mummy will somehow find out about this and make you leave me." Charles felt a tear drop onto his stomach.

"I won't let that happen," he said brushing the hair out of Sebastian's tear-filled eyes. "She can't keep me away from you."

"Yes she can," Sebastian said, his voice filled with grief and despair. "She's done it before and she'll do it again." He held Charles tighter and let more tears fall from his eyes.

"Sebastian," Charles said lovingly as he tipped Sebastian's face up toward his, "listen to me. I'm not going to let that happen. I'm not going to let her take you away from me, do you understand?" Sebastian nodded. "Good, now stop crying because I promise you, this will not be our last night together." Sebastian smiled and kissed him softly on the lips.

"Thank you Charles," he said before laying his head back on Charles' chest. As Sebastian fell asleep Charles hoped and prayed that this was not their last night together. He knew that if Sebastian's mother did try to keep them apart that there really wasn't anything Charles could do about it, she was too powerful. Charles laid his head on Sebastian's and closed his eyes, wishing that the night would never end.


End file.
